bildungsroman: NYC: Spa Castle

[One] Brunch at Clinton Street Baking Co. Voted the BEST BRUNCH by Time Out New York in 2007, and BEST PANCAKES by New York Magazine in 2008, we had a not-so-surprising wait of 45 minutes - 1 hour at 2:30PM (on a Monday!!). To pass the time, we strolled around the area a bit, popping in to expensive ass boutiques where I can only pretend to afford the lint on their floor, and lounging on a bench in a children's playground park. The park soon proved to be a war zone because I had about 3 near death encounters with a stray football during the kid's "friendly", non-regulated playtime.

Brunch was fresh and light this time. Chicken sandwich, veggie sandwich, and Thailan's enormous biscuitpalooza. Had possibly the best homemade potato chips in my life - thick, not too salty, and a little greasy, just the way I like it. While waiting for our food, I saw a tiny Asian girl eating alone next to us, with a pile of pancakes in front of her. What is it about pancakes and waffles that are appetizing to people? I feel like they expand in my stomach, 2 bites and I'm full. If you can finish a whole plate, kudos to you.

[Two] Spa Castle. Took the train all the way to Flushing and ran from the stop to the parking lot where a van shuttles people for free to Spa Castle. After Thailan's initial description of the place (a multi-level spa with Korean and European influences), I had no idea what to expect. All I knew was that they had a flat rate of $35 per person to enjoy all of the amenities in the 100,000 sq. feet building.

1. Changing on the Lobby Floor: The lobby floor is the only floor that is divided into sexes, male and female. After paying the entrance fee, I was given a watch that had a number on it, corresponding to my locker. As soon as you enter the women's side, shoes must be taken off and stowed away (all you do is hold your watch in front of the electronically operated locker, and it clicks open... pretty neat). The women at the counter then hand you a pink/peach Spa Castle outfit to change into, and it's on to the next row of lockers to put away your clothes and belongings. My eyes were fixed on the numbers, barely taking in the surroundings, but when I found my Locker #2505 and my tunnel vision was returned to normal, I was taken aback by the stark naked woman standing right next to it. Stark. Naked. Though I'm used to the nudity somewhat because of working in the hospital, it was still surprising. I quickly averted my gaze (after rudely staring for about 10 seconds), and found that the majority of people walking around were stark naked too. I rushed to the bathroom stalls to change (like a wuss) and met back up with Thailan. She pointed out the "Healing Room/Spa" which reminded me a little bit of the Department of Mysteries from Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix (the ceilings and floors were tiled in all black marble). Aptly nicknamed by me and Thailan as the "Naked Pool", no clothes were allowed in the room that held several spas of varying temperatures, showers, and bathing vanities. Maybe later I would brave the nakedness.

2. Second Floor Outdoor Bade Pool -
Two large spas are compartmentalized into several different sections which are outfitted with jets aimed at various parts of the body. Said to "combine the traditional benefits of hot water immersion and Asian acupressure" the sections each "serve a unique purpose to relieve tension in all parts of the body through the innovative aqua-jets". There are jets aimed at the soles of your feet, hard-hitting jets aimed to massage the muscles in your neck and shoulders, jets soothing your walking muscles in your leg and lower back,
a waterfall that uses pressure to treat tension in your upper body, etc. A bar nearby serves fresh juice and cocktails, and a neighboring Hinoki bath built in natural pine wood provides a warm jacuzzi alternative to the pools. Definitely what I needed after trekking my way through the streets of NYC - my quads were thankful for the star treatment.

3. First Floor - Sauna Valley. The first floor is a multi-purpose level, outfitted with a hardwood floor section designated for sleeping, a "relax lounge" of comfy recliners and individual tv stations, a Food Court complete with chairs and tables, and 7 differently themed saunas off to the side. The seven saunas: 1) L.E.D. sauna room that uses color therapy to improve emotional and psychological health, 2) Gold sauna room which comforts sore limbs, 3) Mineral Salt sauna room that reduces aging, 4) Far Infrared Ray sauna room that reduces fatigue, 5) Iceland sauna room for tightning pores and rejuvenation, 6) Jade sauna room to generally heal the body, and 7) Loess Soil sauna room which provides a place of meditation. This last sauna was my favorite (189 degrees F!), and was most often the quietest. I spread-eagled on the floor, with my head resting on a wooden block, waiting for the sweat to pour. Granted, the heat was suffocating, making it feel like someone was smothering me with a pillow, so I found it easier to take slow breaths through my mouth. I was uneasy and strangely tense at first, fearing that some annoying chit-chatter would break the silence, but after 3 minutes of God-given quiet, I relaxed and let all my weight bear into the mat beneath me.

4. Shaved Ice Dessert

5. Braving the NAKED POOL!!!! I did it. It's just something you have to commit to, all-or-nothing. While yo-yo-ing the idea in my head by my locker, I pushed through the initial embarrassment in the one decisive, and liberating moment that I shed my clothes. Suddenly, I became that stark naked woman I had encountered earlier that day, because now, newcomers to Spa Castle were entering the room, and the nudity issue was still novel and shocking to them. Knowing that I represented boldness to these women was oddly empowering, and all feeling of exposure and vulnerability was erased as I walked smartly into the Naked Pool arena.

Coming to terms with the fact that everyone else in the Naked Pool was just as exposed and insecure as I was, I was comforted in knowing that we were all on the same level. No one would be staring at anyone else - this was not a place of judgment, thank God! The absence of men provided the neutralizing factor. I went from pool to pool, relaxing in the hot bath, and making the brave dip into the cold bath at an icy 64 degrees F. I jumped out of the chilled bath with a stifled shriek and headed to one of the showers that were located in the open along the margins of the room.

Five hours at Spa Castle made the $35 well worth it.

[Three] Frozen Yogurt at Milk Bar, 1/4 of David Chang's Momofuku empire. Billy and Thailan both got a pork bun for a snack, and we all sampled their famed Cereal Milk frozen yogurt. Like Thailan says, "schnozzberries taste like schnozzberries and Cereal Milk tastes like Cereal Milk!"

[Four] St. Marks for Japense tapas at Kenka. With Sapporo's at only $1.50, Kenka is loud, kitschy, and full of red-faced, slightly drunk patrons. At first glance, I mistook the menu for a manga, expecting to see words like "BAM!" and "KAPOW!". Instead, it extensively details their enormous drink and tapas list complete with a "bull penis" gimmick. The crackly, post-war era music in the background sounds like it is playing from an old phonograph in the corner. Though the place couldn't be any more campy, the food hit the spot, and we had a great time.

Butter fried rice with egg yolk, eggplant, toro sashimi, edamame, grilled udon noodles, satayed beef, 4 pints of Sapporo, and 2 glasses of plum wine (which I am now obsessed with).

At the end of the meal, the check
comes out with a medicine cup
filled with pink sugar, one for each guest.
Confused at first, we asked what they were for,
and found out that they were ours to
keep to custom-make our own
cotton candy with their cotton candy
machine located out front.

Thailan making her own cotton candy.

Some rando who climbed down the ladder (pictured)
and striked up a conversation with Billy and Thailan.
He lives in the loft atop Kenka, and claims he's never
eaten there before. I call B.S.!

[Five] Crepes from the cute guy near Astor Place. Cleanest vendor I've seen. An even $5 for any crepe, plus an additional free water bottle. Niiiiice!